Greetings and Salutations
Hope your weekend was fantastic.. I just got back from a 7 day vacation.. I would have loved to report to you that it rocked, but it actually fell alittle short and missed the mark.. It feels much like when you have a meal that was good but "didn't quite hit the spot".. The image I had in my head of what I needed unfortunately never came into focused fruition..
I do feel rested and have to say it was nice to wake up every morning at 0900.. It was great to get out of town.. I read 600 pages out of my book.. I enjoyed hanging out with my friend that was able to come for most of the days I was there.. It just lacked the visual beauty and the "some something" that I was in need of.. It has been more than five years since I have been off the continental US and on a vacation that I have planned.. I want the vacations of my travel days to meet the woman I am today.. Now THAT will be a holiday I can't wait to have.. Maybe getting off the road also got me out of the mindset and zone I was in when I traveled.. After all aren't all things a matter of habits? The habit to never go on vacation and the habit to vacation often? The lessons I learned from this near hit of a vacation are several and I will carry them forward to the next one that I am already mentally planning..
What are some of those lessons? I was ready to get out of the country.. I should have listened to myself.. I still had cellphone coverage (first sign you didn't get far enough away), I didn't need to exchange my money, and I could easily speak English.. Oh yeah, and perhaps the most important thing is that I never needed my passport.. Doesn't get any more disappointing than that.. Absolutely no disrespect to Puerto Rico, but it just wasn't the place for me.. I knew this intuitively yet I chose to ignore it.. My need to get away over-road my ability to put off the trip and save more money to have more distant destination choices.. I need to learn to truly trust my instincts when it comes to places I am interested in visiting.. I know myself better than I think I do sometimes..
While I don't think of myself as a hotel snot, apparently as you get older (for me) I am requiring a level of sophistication that I have never desired until now.. I am talking about hotel land somewhere between The Four Seasons and Motel Six.. I like fluffy bedding and a room that has great karma and a happy vibe... I love a garden tub that I can "swim" in atleast daily.. One of my favorite ways to relax is in a nice hot, deep, bubble bath.. In the dark surrounded with candles, my favorite music, and a glass of wine in my hand..
I need to have a beautiful view out of my window with a balcony.. Mountains covered in trees serving as a backdrop to beautiful blue waters or in a bustling city with people moving about in their daily lives while I observe a moment in time I am taking a break from.. I want to perch in a comfee chair on that balcony while sipping morning coffee or an evening cocktail while being enveloped with sights and sounds my environment.. To soak up my surroundings like a piece of bread and let the moments infuse into my bones and soul.. Feel the warm breeze on my skin and through my hair.. You know, where you close your eyes and feel the moment caress you.. For me, I guess the surroundings of where I live, even temporarily, have a deeper impact on me then I have ever recognized.. This is a new lesson I have learned about myself that I must incorporate into my vacations and never deny myself from a wonderful hotel in the perfect location ever again..
I want a body massage in a cabana on the beach by a really hot masseuse.. I want to do yoga on the beach at sunrise and sunset.. I want someone to personally show me the sights and cool places without only being in a group.. I want to hangout in a really cool bar with a warm ambiance and meet awesome local people that make me laugh and feel special to have crossed paths with them.. I want to incorporate those experiences into my soul when I feel gratitude and awe that I am living that moment.. I want to go to bed early and wake up early.. I want to take in the local music scene.. I want to feel every endorphin in my body as I am wrapped in the moment and never want it to stop.. See every sunrise and sunset..
So at the end of the day did my vacation suck? It wasn't all bad.. I will use my fresh experience to move forward and plan a vacation that suits who I have become today.. I feel focused and have my eye on the ball of my life that I am making for myself.. Loose ends are coming together and I am obtaining new stride with the rhythm of my life.. Focus--that is the best gift this vacation could give me.. Knowing that I will have another chance to get it right on my next holiday makes my current reflection "all good in the hood" so to speak.. My ultimate goal would be to share it with someone special.. Funny, what if I planned a couples vacation and found someone along the way? Maybe planning one alone keeps it that way.. Then I could blog about all the places I would like to have sex...oh wait...that would be a different kind of blog
Tootles :)
Heather
Monday, July 1, 2013
Monday, June 17, 2013
Secondary Gains Add To Your Success
Greetings and Salutations
Hope this finds you well as always.. Tonight I was thinking about how to inspire yourself and how action(s) that you take can do that.. When you are looking to do something different, change something, or improve upon something you must of course first being to think of what needs to different, changed, or improved.. Spend some time thinking about this.. A well thought out plan is an organized and linear approach to devise the action that you need to make things happen.. This plan is shifting in both length and scope in direct relationship to what you get accomplished and what either gets a check mark, addition, or strike on the list.. A plan must be flexible in order to keep you moving in a forward direction.. You have thought about it, lamented about it, prayed about it, and written it down a million times.. There comes a point when you begin your journey and figure it out as you progress down the path of your life.. When it moves from paper to reality..
Let me give you some examples of that I am talking about.. Out of my need to do more social things I joined few Meet-Up groups last year.. The one I have really stuck with is a cooking class.. Without making a dissertation of what this class really is, the most important thing is the by-product of this class.. It got me back in the kitchen.. Last year when I started participating in this group I was on cooking strike that had lasted six months (or more).. From there I bridged the gap of wanting to make lunches for the work week in my head to actually making it happen.. When I go to these classes it reinforces my presence in the kitchen and renews my commitment to cook my meals on a consistent basis (ie for the work week, not when being social).. It gives me new ideas to try out.. It INSPIRES me to be in the kitchen in general.. To associate fun with that activity if for nothing else to be creative in the kitchen.. When I help create food in her kitchen I would normally shy away from (but love) to try myself, it gives me confidence to remember I have already done it once, so there for I am more likely to try again.. It works.. I love cooking so much better.. I am getting around not wanting to cook just for myself by cooking the meals for the week (for dinner).. This is my current project: Make dinners when I make work lunches on Sundays..
Here is another example.. I am reading a book about time management.. Now to be completely transparent this book kinda frustrates me, here again is the cliff notes version, because I have to constantly read between the lines.. I have to translate the ideas into my world.. Figure out how I can make it work for me in my life.... I don't work for myself or from home.. I don't have a husband and kids (the main two perspectives of this great book).. The thing that has kept me reading is that this chick is spot on about how she sees time.. I am really starting to get a handle on managing my time sooo much better.. It is difficult to put into words.. Its really super cool.. Makes me want to write a book one day about time management from the perspective of single, in your forty's and no kids without having to read between the lines.. I am looking at time in smaller blocks instead of a continuous stream.. For instance I dedicate "X" amount of time to doing something: cleaning, reading, writing Thank You notes, yard work, etc.. When that time is up I then move to the next task to be done.. I repeat this until I have accomplished my goal.. More often than not, setting an allotted amount of time and sticking to it amazingly gets the job done the first time around..
Thinking about time and how I want to spend it lead me to cancel my cable.. I have no idea where you are on the continuum of TV watching but, while I don't watch much on TV what I do too frequently sucks me in.. I waste too much time if it is anything more than about four hours a week watching anything (including an average weekend) and usually it is.. Funny truth is that not having cable has never occurred to me as an option.. Until now.. I traded TV money for a monthly massage membership.. Not a dime (extra) comes out of my budget from what I have been spending already.. After thinking about it for about 2 . 2 nanoseconds massage trumps TV any day of the week..
I hope you see the over all point I am making with my living examples.. On my chalkboard in my kitchen the current message is "Never stop improving.. Think quality of life, always".. Develop a list and decide what you want out of your life.. Be open and look for the secondary gain in all things.. Especially the ones that you think won't make a contribution to your cause.. Often, its those that can inspire you the most.. Don't forget your primary goal is to get your life headed in a forward direction.. Now get your badonkadonk and get moving..
Tootles :)
Heather
Hope this finds you well as always.. Tonight I was thinking about how to inspire yourself and how action(s) that you take can do that.. When you are looking to do something different, change something, or improve upon something you must of course first being to think of what needs to different, changed, or improved.. Spend some time thinking about this.. A well thought out plan is an organized and linear approach to devise the action that you need to make things happen.. This plan is shifting in both length and scope in direct relationship to what you get accomplished and what either gets a check mark, addition, or strike on the list.. A plan must be flexible in order to keep you moving in a forward direction.. You have thought about it, lamented about it, prayed about it, and written it down a million times.. There comes a point when you begin your journey and figure it out as you progress down the path of your life.. When it moves from paper to reality..
Let me give you some examples of that I am talking about.. Out of my need to do more social things I joined few Meet-Up groups last year.. The one I have really stuck with is a cooking class.. Without making a dissertation of what this class really is, the most important thing is the by-product of this class.. It got me back in the kitchen.. Last year when I started participating in this group I was on cooking strike that had lasted six months (or more).. From there I bridged the gap of wanting to make lunches for the work week in my head to actually making it happen.. When I go to these classes it reinforces my presence in the kitchen and renews my commitment to cook my meals on a consistent basis (ie for the work week, not when being social).. It gives me new ideas to try out.. It INSPIRES me to be in the kitchen in general.. To associate fun with that activity if for nothing else to be creative in the kitchen.. When I help create food in her kitchen I would normally shy away from (but love) to try myself, it gives me confidence to remember I have already done it once, so there for I am more likely to try again.. It works.. I love cooking so much better.. I am getting around not wanting to cook just for myself by cooking the meals for the week (for dinner).. This is my current project: Make dinners when I make work lunches on Sundays..
Here is another example.. I am reading a book about time management.. Now to be completely transparent this book kinda frustrates me, here again is the cliff notes version, because I have to constantly read between the lines.. I have to translate the ideas into my world.. Figure out how I can make it work for me in my life.... I don't work for myself or from home.. I don't have a husband and kids (the main two perspectives of this great book).. The thing that has kept me reading is that this chick is spot on about how she sees time.. I am really starting to get a handle on managing my time sooo much better.. It is difficult to put into words.. Its really super cool.. Makes me want to write a book one day about time management from the perspective of single, in your forty's and no kids without having to read between the lines.. I am looking at time in smaller blocks instead of a continuous stream.. For instance I dedicate "X" amount of time to doing something: cleaning, reading, writing Thank You notes, yard work, etc.. When that time is up I then move to the next task to be done.. I repeat this until I have accomplished my goal.. More often than not, setting an allotted amount of time and sticking to it amazingly gets the job done the first time around..
Thinking about time and how I want to spend it lead me to cancel my cable.. I have no idea where you are on the continuum of TV watching but, while I don't watch much on TV what I do too frequently sucks me in.. I waste too much time if it is anything more than about four hours a week watching anything (including an average weekend) and usually it is.. Funny truth is that not having cable has never occurred to me as an option.. Until now.. I traded TV money for a monthly massage membership.. Not a dime (extra) comes out of my budget from what I have been spending already.. After thinking about it for about 2 . 2 nanoseconds massage trumps TV any day of the week..
I hope you see the over all point I am making with my living examples.. On my chalkboard in my kitchen the current message is "Never stop improving.. Think quality of life, always".. Develop a list and decide what you want out of your life.. Be open and look for the secondary gain in all things.. Especially the ones that you think won't make a contribution to your cause.. Often, its those that can inspire you the most.. Don't forget your primary goal is to get your life headed in a forward direction.. Now get your badonkadonk and get moving..
Tootles :)
Heather
Monday, June 10, 2013
The Best Has Yet To Come....Right?
Greetings and Salutations
Tonight I was pulling into my driveway when a song came on the radio that I don't think I have heard in about forever.. You know the kind, the ones you haven't heard in years yet you immediately know all the words and can remember what you were doing when you heard it last.. The tune has left me as the music I am currently listening to fills my head but I can tell you I know exactly what I was doing the last time I heard it.. I was about sixteen or seventeen and I was slow dancing with some dude.. I can remember back then I didn't know what the world had in store for me but I was filled with potential.. Filled with all the possibilities the way you are when you are in your late teens and feel that the world is an endless place of opportunity.. You hadn't had much time to screw up your life if you were lucky and I was.. I had managed to stave off teen pregnancy and drugs to name a few.. I knew I was going to attend college.. I knew I was going to be a nurse.. I remember how attention from a guy made me feel nervous.. I can picture myself as if it was yesterday yet I remain now as I was then speechless as to describe what I was feeling inside.. I do know now the thought that never dawned on me during that time in my life.. That what I wanted and what reality would be for me were two very distinct points that would for the next twenty-six years not always be one in the same..
What is the task of your forties? I don't mean Erickson's teachings.. I mean without looking it up in a book what is the task at hand? When I was in my late teens and early twenty's it never occurred to me that there was a difference between what I wanted and what I would have.. That is an interesting truth to admit to myself.. I followed along.. I graduated from high school.. I went to college.. I graduated with a degree and career.. I got married.. Then what? I got divorced.. Then what? I stuck around Charleston for a few years working.. Then I traveled for ten years.. I played.. I traveled.. I partied.. Then what? I met the guy I honestly believed what the "one".. I came home.. Five years and lots of tears later he is one of my best friends, but I am back to the drawing board.. In my forties I find myself compelled to be the best I can be.. To make those choices that some make earlier in life and others have still yet to figure out.. Decisions that I didn't or haven't made until now for myself.. I am trying to make better choices with my time, friends, potential lovers, job, and effort in life..
I was talking to a friend this morning and she was telling me about how old she felt physically.. It isn't as much the actual words she was saying.. It was the message I heard underneath the words.. "I'm forty-eight and I'm old".. The other day I saw Maya Angelou on Oprah and she was talking about how with each decade it gets better and better from thirties, forties, fifties etc.. She said the seventies and eighties rock and put the other years to shame.. So how do I figure out how to fight the feeling that I can't get to where I want to be? That I am not past my "prime" if the best has yet to come? I know for sure I'll continue to travel in a forward direction because while I am trying to figure it all out time will pass anyway.. Might as well keep making efforts to improve the quality of my life.. And I guess that IS the thing I am striving for.. Not just better choices in life but to change the quality of my life..
Maybe if I keep my head in the space that everything I am doing contributes to that quality I can get over the hump.. I can accept that when you go from floating along in life and making the best of what comes your way is completely different then CREATING a life that is full of quality.. That the latter takes lots and lots of work, dedication, and patience for the payoff.. Maybe this is the task of your forties.. Quality in life and everything that you choose to fill it with.. How you choose to face those things that you may not have either had a choice in or happened as a direct result of poor thought processes at the time..
I will plugging along and choose to believe that my future is bright with possibilities and that I feel blessed when I help other people, including myself, though being a nurse or writing a blog.. I will continue to follow this path and enjoy the journey along the way.. All things truly are possible and if you get bored or give up and close your eyes that is when you will miss your turn to your destiny.. I don't know about you but I would rather stay awake and not miss the turn in the first place.. I get the phrase 'the journey is the destination' and I totally believe in it.. I don't want to rush it but at the same time I can't help to feel "am I there yet?"
Tootles :)
Heather
Tonight I was pulling into my driveway when a song came on the radio that I don't think I have heard in about forever.. You know the kind, the ones you haven't heard in years yet you immediately know all the words and can remember what you were doing when you heard it last.. The tune has left me as the music I am currently listening to fills my head but I can tell you I know exactly what I was doing the last time I heard it.. I was about sixteen or seventeen and I was slow dancing with some dude.. I can remember back then I didn't know what the world had in store for me but I was filled with potential.. Filled with all the possibilities the way you are when you are in your late teens and feel that the world is an endless place of opportunity.. You hadn't had much time to screw up your life if you were lucky and I was.. I had managed to stave off teen pregnancy and drugs to name a few.. I knew I was going to attend college.. I knew I was going to be a nurse.. I remember how attention from a guy made me feel nervous.. I can picture myself as if it was yesterday yet I remain now as I was then speechless as to describe what I was feeling inside.. I do know now the thought that never dawned on me during that time in my life.. That what I wanted and what reality would be for me were two very distinct points that would for the next twenty-six years not always be one in the same..
What is the task of your forties? I don't mean Erickson's teachings.. I mean without looking it up in a book what is the task at hand? When I was in my late teens and early twenty's it never occurred to me that there was a difference between what I wanted and what I would have.. That is an interesting truth to admit to myself.. I followed along.. I graduated from high school.. I went to college.. I graduated with a degree and career.. I got married.. Then what? I got divorced.. Then what? I stuck around Charleston for a few years working.. Then I traveled for ten years.. I played.. I traveled.. I partied.. Then what? I met the guy I honestly believed what the "one".. I came home.. Five years and lots of tears later he is one of my best friends, but I am back to the drawing board.. In my forties I find myself compelled to be the best I can be.. To make those choices that some make earlier in life and others have still yet to figure out.. Decisions that I didn't or haven't made until now for myself.. I am trying to make better choices with my time, friends, potential lovers, job, and effort in life..
I was talking to a friend this morning and she was telling me about how old she felt physically.. It isn't as much the actual words she was saying.. It was the message I heard underneath the words.. "I'm forty-eight and I'm old".. The other day I saw Maya Angelou on Oprah and she was talking about how with each decade it gets better and better from thirties, forties, fifties etc.. She said the seventies and eighties rock and put the other years to shame.. So how do I figure out how to fight the feeling that I can't get to where I want to be? That I am not past my "prime" if the best has yet to come? I know for sure I'll continue to travel in a forward direction because while I am trying to figure it all out time will pass anyway.. Might as well keep making efforts to improve the quality of my life.. And I guess that IS the thing I am striving for.. Not just better choices in life but to change the quality of my life..
Maybe if I keep my head in the space that everything I am doing contributes to that quality I can get over the hump.. I can accept that when you go from floating along in life and making the best of what comes your way is completely different then CREATING a life that is full of quality.. That the latter takes lots and lots of work, dedication, and patience for the payoff.. Maybe this is the task of your forties.. Quality in life and everything that you choose to fill it with.. How you choose to face those things that you may not have either had a choice in or happened as a direct result of poor thought processes at the time..
I will plugging along and choose to believe that my future is bright with possibilities and that I feel blessed when I help other people, including myself, though being a nurse or writing a blog.. I will continue to follow this path and enjoy the journey along the way.. All things truly are possible and if you get bored or give up and close your eyes that is when you will miss your turn to your destiny.. I don't know about you but I would rather stay awake and not miss the turn in the first place.. I get the phrase 'the journey is the destination' and I totally believe in it.. I don't want to rush it but at the same time I can't help to feel "am I there yet?"
Tootles :)
Heather
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